Why yes, yes I think I did.

Can you believe it? I went and made her mad. Why you ask? Because I actually said that unbearable word "NO".

Yep MY life has been a life always trying to please others and then becoming angry. God kept trying to point this out to me and I just wouldn't listen. So more often than not, that anger would brew and I would end up in trouble, one more time. Everytime this happened I would hear from people that cared for me, to stop, learn to be grateful..ANYTHING....... but that constant anger that was usually brewing under everything. And don't you know, it was everyone else' fault.

Well if you have kept up with my journey at all, or perhaps know me, you then know I have been in the process of CHANGE. Absolutely NOT because I wanted to, but because I had to. I had to, to live.

I love fiercely, and passionately, and I also bring that same enthusiasm when it comes to feeling ANGER. And yep, it sincerely ruined my "then" life. I thought it was because others were rude, backstabbing, self centered morons. I just have to add this, I am in NO way ever going to say that a few people in my life weren't exactly that, I just reacted poorly, very poorly.

In reality, who gives two flying craps if people act that way. I don't have to be near them.........BUT, at the time I did.

Guess what? As it turns out, I am actually in a place in my heart and with God, that now....I don't even recognize that behavior. Sounds crazy, well I never claimed to be sane, but when people are negative or mean, 90% of the time I don't even notice. I am happy on the inside and it shows. So in my reality, if someone is being rude, I think, "Wow, guess they are having a bad day", cause it couldn't possibly be me, I'm nice. LOL....

So it would have it, I was offered an incredible business proposition, or so I thought. I had the good fortune to be able to work in that business for several months, the whole time preparing for this wonderful opportunity and transition. Couldn't wait for the shift from "hers" to "mine".

As it all started to bubble and be more and more a reality, something hit me like a lead ball. The business was not what it appeared. It was not a good fit for me and it was starting to make me uncomfortable and angry just being there. I can really thank God for showing me this.

At first, I wouldn't hear anyone who would tell me this was not for me. I tried everything I could to make this a reality. Everywhere I turned, I ran into brick walls. Financing, accessing my own funds, asking for people to invest, but nothing. One big fail after another.

I came to this reality right before a major holiday, and held tight my tongue. I knew if I told her that we had changed our minds, I had changed MY mind, that she would surely cut off her nose to spite her face. She had no other help, and had not even tried to get any. The holiday surely went from bad to worse. Then I knew I had made the right decision for me.

After the holiday had run it's course, we still didn't catch a break. We stayed so busy, and once again, it was just us, or should I say, just ME.......I get it, I was an employee at this point, but a very tired, disgruntled  employee, who might I add, was expected to buy this business. I was OVER it. So I told her.

All I can say is, thank you God for throwing those road blocks in front of me to steer me in the direction I am headed now. We are opening our on shop, with a twist. I am going to be able to do the 3 things I love most. Paint, flowers and teach. Such a wonderful concept, and it's MINE.

This is a road to joyous tiredness. I love what I do, and I can't wait to share it with everyone! Very soon we will open, and will be small business owners. I am surprisingly not afraid, but excited and I know, this was exactly where I was meant to be.........See you soon!